Best Surgeon Around

Three Massachusetts surgeons were having lunch together and discussing surgeries they had performed. One of them said, "I'm the best surgeon around. A concert pianist lost seven fingers in an accident. I reattached them, and 8 months later, he performed a private concert for the Queen of England."

The second surgeon said, "That's nothing. A young man lost both arms and legs in a terrible accident. I reattached them, and 2 years later, he won 2 gold medals in field events in the Olympics."

The third surgeon said, "You guys are amateurs. Several years ago, a guy who was high on cocaine and alcohol rode a horse head-on into a train traveling 80 miles an hour. All I had left to work with was the horse's ass and a necktie. He's just received the Democratic nomination for President of the United States!"

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